I don't know why you'd want to read this, ay? I'm nobody special, not even famous, though I might be after this book. That'd be wicked. Maybe I could get a girlfriend then, a cute one. We'd kiss.

Anyway, enough mushy stuff for now. You'll have to read the book, which is about me trying to get this hot babe named Ashleigh to love me. I won't tell you how it ends, but I will say that I don't like happy endings. When I watch an action movie, I'm always hoping for the good-looking star to get his butt kicked, or die. It'd probably be better if I didn't die at the end of this book, though. Then I couldn't collect my money, or write a sequel.

Well, enough from me. If you want to send emails, pics or money, please do. But don't send me any junk. Remember, I'll have your email address.

Yours Truely,
Tony Ross.

(Penguin books and Pat Flynn present a new comedy series beginning in March, 2008)

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